i hate it because sometimes i miss him. A LOT. i definitely know that i am better off without him, it wasn't meant to be, i'll find somebody who really loves me.... all that shit. i know it. but sometimes i still feel that little pain in my heart.like today, when i was watching vh1 soul, a bobby brown video came on. bb doesn't usually make me sad, but when i heard it, it reminded me of the night that we all went out and did karoke and he sang bobby. that was one of the funnest nights. as much as he might have played me, nights like that were real. and the nights where we went to the lake at 3am and fed the ducks. and nights when we stayed up all night cooking and listening to old soul music. that was all real. and the pain still is too.